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PORNO AND PEPPERONCINIS

CHAMPIONS OF SMALL TALK

BEST FRIENDS FOREVER

 

MOLESKINE

 

 

 

In this time of great national struggle it is more important now than ever to look towards the last vestiges of light coming from the beacon of democracy to guide us through the class V+ whitewater rapids we, with our many bratty, spoiled children, are flailing around in. Oh, the water's cold, Oh N. Korea is splashing me, Oh I don't like the outdoors, why can't I stay in the hotel room and play NintenDogs? If you happen to fall out when we hit the rock of global warming guess who's not going to save you? Yeah, I'm talking to you, Japan. Afghanistan, honey, you know democracy can't guide this boat all by itself, get paddling, it needs your help! And Yes, of course by democracy I mean voting in on-line polls. Personality quizzes. What celebrity baby name will your fourth child have? That kind of thing. So do the next generation a favor, even if they don't really deserve it (hello High School Musical!) and make an arbitrary vote below for the president of this incalcuably insignificant website. Oh, and there might be campaign videos if you click on the patriotic portraits above.

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